Well friends, the end of the school year has come, and summer's promising heat and passion is upon us. Sometimes I feel like my life is a picture book that someone is flipping through far too fast. I remember moving in to my apartment on August 19,2011. I hated it, carrying box after box up three flights of stairs! I remember going to the foam party with Logan and meeting up with my cousin for the first time. 
There were lots of good moments this past school year. Making a sister out of a roommate, becoming closer to Jo, becoming the blogging director of Method Seven Magazine. I got to see musicals and live dance performances. I went to Jean Paul Gaultier's amazing avant-garde exhibit for free. There were trips to Dallas, going into H&M for the first time, kissing boys. There was spending a night with my BFF, holding two clothing swaps (and attending several more!), learning how to cook (and only starting a small fire once!).
I got to hear filmmakers speak at the Dallas Film Festival, I got to go to fashion shows.I was privileged enough to work a seasonal position at Kohl's, I got to view the North Texas Fashion Collection (AH-MAH-ZING!) Happy Endings got a full second season renewal (and a third was just announced!) I learned to drive. I surprised a soldier on her first trip back home. I went to parties. I met lots of warm, friendly people. I got to witness two souls uniting in love, giving me a new uncle and cousin.I got to spend time with my four beautiful, strong, inspiring aunts. I didn't change my major, an accomplishment in itself (this is my first semester not to do so!). Friends made the drive out to see me. I was introduced to a lot of kick-ass new music. I got to be there as friends graduated and begin the next leg of their journey. I turned 20, a beautiful, even age.There were so many wonderful things that happened this semester and I am really grateful for it all.
Of course, there was the bad. Being ignored by a good friend for no apparent reason. Losing a very close friend to pettiness. "Breaking up" with the highschool sweetheart (although that was easier than most would think). Dealing with stressful housing situations. Not being able to find a job. Chicken heads. Smelly fish soup. Sending One Tree Hill into the land of the "completed tv series." Not having a car. And of course, having to say goodbye to four wonderful, crazy, special, beautiful people. That was the worst thing of all, ever. There were days when I couldn't get out of bed, there were times when I couldn't breathe because I was struggling under grief and sadness and loss. I skipped a lot of classes and spent far too many nights crying over all of it. I still do. I will, for the rest of my life, mourn my gone-too-soon friends.
Of course, there was the bad. Being ignored by a good friend for no apparent reason. Losing a very close friend to pettiness. "Breaking up" with the highschool sweetheart (although that was easier than most would think). Dealing with stressful housing situations. Not being able to find a job. Chicken heads. Smelly fish soup. Sending One Tree Hill into the land of the "completed tv series." Not having a car. And of course, having to say goodbye to four wonderful, crazy, special, beautiful people. That was the worst thing of all, ever. There were days when I couldn't get out of bed, there were times when I couldn't breathe because I was struggling under grief and sadness and loss. I skipped a lot of classes and spent far too many nights crying over all of it. I still do. I will, for the rest of my life, mourn my gone-too-soon friends.
But that is life. There is happiness and tragedy laced together. It doesn't mean life is not worth living, knowing that there will be bad things, horrible things that shake you to your core and don't make sense. It just means that when you see that sun peeking out from behind the clouds, gratitude will wash over you, and you will have a better sense of understanding and compassion. I do, and I will continue to carry it with me as I embark on my junior year in college.
Thank you to all who have been apart of it in some way.
Mom and Dad, thank you for providing me with a house and food, and an education. As much as I hate studying and homework, I love learning, and I love you too. Thank you to my family, all of you, for supporting me, especially Mo. Ann & Jeff, Ms. Adwell, and countless others, thank you for your support following October 10, 2011. 
Logan, I'm glad we grew closer this year! You are amazing, don't sell yourself short :) Lupita, you beautiful girl, thank you for being there on one of the hardest days of my life and THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for getting me a job! Jo, you awesome boy! You have been an amazing friend this year. Thank you for all of the rides, hugs, encouragement and food you've shared with me. I miss you already. Sayida, thank you for all of the crazy times, moments, and pictures. Thank you for the rides, and the shopping trips. I love coming home to you honey. My Bloggy Bunch, you are the laughter on my dark days. You are awesome, and inspiring and I hope you never stop blogging!
My Monkey, your little voice is the one I love the most. I miss you crazy, kid, and I can't wait until you start kindergarden this fall so we can talk about school! Staysha, thank you for being there for me at three in the morning when I am crying so hard I can't sleep. We'll get through this together. Ashley and Cassie, my far away best friends, I love you two more than you will ever know. Thank you for sticking by me through everything since the beginning. Chris, I can't believe my junior high boyfriend is going to be a dad! You are going to be amazing at it. I can't wait to meet Sophia and I hope that I am as good of a friend to her as you have been to me. To that asshole boy, you taught me a lot about myself this year. I hope you find the happiness you're looking for.
And of course, thank you to Danielle Ann Ruthstrom, Justin Delany Armstrong, and Stephen and Michael Eckel. You changed my life in ways you will never know. Thank you for being a part of it, even if it was for a short time. I miss you everyday, but I know you're watching over me. You helped me make this year a great one, because I had a greater appreciation of life that you have given me. I'm glad we were friends. I love you.
You're welcome for the music too. lol Thank you so much for helping me out these past couple of weeks. I'm glad we've become closer and I wish you the best because you deserve it!!
ReplyDeleteI can't believe you made an account just to comment me! You are awesome Jo. It's no problem at all. I hope that you stay here so we will still have each other. Good luck finding an apartment ;)
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